These Are My Confessions

During my 10th post, my brother asked me if I did this blog to educate/encourage others or is it for an outlet and I told him both but today this is definitely an outlet.  Today was an emotional day for me. My thoughts can be the death of me; I think about my current situation of my career, my finances, and of course my relationship status.  I was scrolling on FB and this particular day the posts that I see that people are making moves (not excuses) and living the life had me feeling some type of way.  One my Sorority Sisters has a blog out called "The Girl With Big Hair(IG:@TheGirlwBigHair) has a  post on Self-Care and one of those self-cares was to take a break on Social media.  Which I have said in a previous post and what I have done from time to time because its certainly needed. You can get so overwhelmed with people and their business....it's just best for your mental and emotional to take a TIME OUT of social media.


So this post is about confessions and yes my title was inspired by Usher's Confessions and since this blog is #13yearsandcounting, I am going to share 13 out of my many confessions.  By the way, some people may think this is TOO personal and I shouldn't put ALL my business out there but this helps me out.  As a Single-Introverted lady, writing my thoughts down de-stresses me and if you want to get biblical with it John 8:32 says "Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free". Even though this scripture is talking about Jesus, the feeling when telling the truth  indeed frees you.. James 5:16 says "Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed. The urgent request of a righteous person is very powerful in its effect". Confess is the keyword.  Holding on to mistakes you made or if someone has offended you (whether big or small) is not going help you with  the progression of life.  As I said in my previous posts that Jesus died for ALL OF THAT (In my up North accent).  If the God of the Creator of ALL things can forgive us, we can certainly forgive ourselves.

Confession #13: I have a stack of books that I haven't read yet. Not a big reader but I am working on it.

Confession #12  I ate out all this week.

Confession #11:  I still talk with "Dear Guy Friend" in hopes something would change God's mind but God knows what's best for me

Confession #10: I DO NOT LIKE DONALD J. TRUMP  AS PRESIDENT

Confession #9:  I sometimes put myself in comprising positions

Confessions #8:  I "gospelize" secular music

Confession #7:  Depression is real and I deal with it at times (I've gotten WAY better Thank you JESUS)

Confession #6:  I have a guitar that I asked my mother to get me for Christmas almost 7 years ago (maybe more) and I don't know how to play it

Confession #5: I don't study my Word as much as I should

Confession #4:  I don't like being pressured when committing to something but I can do the pressuring (double standard I know)

Confession #3:  My 14th year of my singleness is coming up in a couple of months and still no prospects

Confession #2:   I am such a movie fanatic that I decided to work at a movie theater

Confession #1:  I LOVE CHICKEN WINGS

THESE ARE JUST SOME OF MY CONFESSIONS

Sin's a Hell of a Drug

Rest Well Rick James:(

Remember Dave's Chappelle's Comedy sketch show called  "Chappelle's Show"? Remember He had Rick James on his show and one of Rick James famous quotes on there was "Cocaine's a hell of a drug".  Well I am here to tell you that Sin's a Hell of a Drug.

Rest Well Whitney :(

I have never taken illegal drugs before, but I have seen the effects of  them with people and it doesn't look good at all. I see that when people take cocaine, ecstasy and whatever other drug that is out there to get you high, it gives you a good feeling and takes you to a place where your mind wouldn't normally be at but over time, it will break down your body to the point of death if nothing is done about it.

Sin is something VERY similar to drugs. It is very tempting to do; it may look good, taste good, and make you feel good for a moment but eventually it will bring you to a place of depression, sorrow, and a WHOLE LOT OF GUILT.  For instance,you have Adam and Eve (Genesis 3:1-24) living it up in the garden of Eden, PARADISE. God has allowed them to have everything that they want and need, but the one thing that God instructed them (Adam) to not eat of the tree of knowledge of Good and Evil. Now the question that some folks would ask and me playing devil's advocate is why did God put that tree in the garden in the first place? Hmm...maybe because He's God and He can do what He wants or maybe to see if Adam and Eve would actually obey Him...idk, you would actually have to ask God.  That is one interesting thing about God the Father, we will not understand everything that He does but just know that what He allows to happen or what He allows NOT happen is FOR OUR GOOD (Romans 8:28).

So in this story of Adam and Eve, we know that the serpent, the enemy, Satan decides to speak with Eve and ask her "Did God really say, You must not eat from any tree in the garden? (Gen. 3:1 niv)" Let's pause right there for a second. God told Adam and Adam told Eve not to eat from this particular tree and then someone else came in and say "Did God really say...".  You can get so many messages such as why did the serpent go to Eve instead of Adam? That shows one thing about Satan, he is the author of confusion because as Christians, we know that marriage is set up as God, Husband then Wife.  I am sorry (not sorry) ladies out there that are controlling and not submissive and want to be the man in the relationship; Like Eve, you are way out of order. Also two other things stuck out to me; One, Don't let any ole body be up in your relationship because they could be just like the snake slithering around causing trouble (that was for the Christian Couple courting and the married). And two, KNOW THE WORD OF GOD YOURSELF.  If God says thou shall not kill, don't kill. If God says love thy neighbor as thyself, do it! Don't allow the Enemy to confuse you and say to you "Did God really say don't covet your neighbor's wife" or "Did God really say that homosexuality is an abomination to Him? " The Devil is sneaky and he knows your strengths and struggles.  He doesn't care about your strengths, all he wants to do is prey on your struggles so you...we won't please God and be that living and holy sacrifice that we need to be (Romans 12:1-2).

Jesus Christ is known as the "Second Adam". The first and original Adam brought sin into the world but Jesus our Lord and Savior beat and defeated the enemy, the grave, and death so He can save us from our sins (John 3:16-17).

I just want to encourage everyone who is reading this is that whatever you maybe struggling  with, just know that JESUS IS THE ANSWER.  While He was here on this earth, He healed many people from the blind man, to the man with the many demons inside of him, to the lady with the issue of blood. I always say in my prayers, if you did it for Womanizer King David, you can do it for me, if you did it for Prostituting Rahab, you can do it for me, if you did it for Persecuting Saul (Apostle Paul), you can do it for me, if you did it for Denying ole Peter, you can do it for ME! And if He can save and love one of his daughters that struggles through her singleness and not allowing Him to be my comfort or as I say Cuddle Buddy, He can certainly do it for you! The Almighty God that brought His ONLY beloved Son to come into the world and save us from our own destruction LOVES US THROUGH IT ALL.

Why settle for less when you can have God's Best!

Everyone has a struggle and at some point everyone has settled. Life can seem difficult because what we desire hasn't come to past and we are waiting, and waiting and waiting.  We are doing the right thing but we are still waiting.  So at a certain point, we settle.

 I am known for settling: Settling with "Situationships", settling with just breezing through school, settling with a job that I really do not desire to be at.  I have been comfortable with just settling and not pushing myself to greater. 

I don't beat myself on it too much because life is full of lessons. On my third day of work, I had an epiphany. My epiphany was that I have allowed myself to settle in the field that I am in now for years and I did it because it was easy to get into. Instead of working hard to pass my Teacher's examinations, I just went with what I can get.  It doesn't bring me joy, I am not happy.. so why am I still in this situation? As I said before, life is full of lessons and because it's something that I have to do now, I have stopped complaining and now am doing something about it so that I can work towards what God has called me to do and what I desire to do. Do what you HAVE to do until you can do what you WANT to do is a quote that I am living by now. Even in the spiritual.  I have to invest in godly matters; studying God's word, praying often, fasting, sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ, using the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23), keeping myself from temptation, being proactive to reach my goals and staying pure in thought, word, and deed.  Now I don't do the those things because God is going to bless me because,  He is going to bless me with the things He promised me and more, but I am doing it because I want to PLEASE GOD.  I want to be a living proof of God's existence, of His love, and His compassion towards His creation. 

One of my many confessions is that I am flawed person and I do make mistakes, as EVERYONE ELSE.  We are not exempt from falling and making mistakes because sin entered into the world (Genesis 3). However, 42 generations later, God was like Rafiki from the Lion King and said it is time to

bring His Son on the scene so He can become sin and  saved the World from sin (John 3:16-17). Could you imagine? After Adam and Eve  messed up our opportunity for living in paradise, God not only took care of them in their sin, he continued to bless them and later on gave us a Savior name Jesus Christ and a Counselor name the Holy Spirit or for those Baptist out there the Holy GHOST! What an AWESOME GOD WE SERVE! In spite of our wrong doings, God still loves us and blesses us. Now, he is going to correct us but He does that because He LOVES us (Proverbs 3:12). He wants the VERY BEST for His Children!

Whether it is a relationship/marriage we desire, a job, a business opportunity, ANYTHING, God wants to give His VERY BEST FOR US. It is up to us to continue to TRUST in Him with the paths He takes us to get to our next destination.

Remember, you are TOO important and TOO valuable to settle for less. We know our worth because we were made in the image of God: We are FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made, we are MORE than Conquerors, We are love and joy and peace, WE CAN DO ALL THINGS THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES US STRENGTH!

Don't allow the Devil to fool you into thinking that because you are still single or you became single after a breakup that you are not worth it. YOU. ARE. WORTH. THE. WAIT. God is going to BLOW our minds at what He is doing. Continue to Trust Him and He will lead and guide you every step of the WAY!

Flaws and All: My 1st Love

"Sometimes I talk a little too much

Don't listen enough
Sometimes it's way too easy for me to beat myself up
Sometimes I hate the way I look when I look in the mirror
One look from you I know
My flaws
You love, you love my flaws
Think they make me beautiful
You don't see them as flaws at all
That's why
That's why, that's why I love you
Cause you are, you are the one who
The one who loves my flaws"

Those are the words of Kierra Sheard's Flaws and when I heard the words,  it was like I wrote those words.  Forever I didn't think much of me and now that my relationship with God is stronger than before, I am so in awe that this awesome, magnificent, beautiful, all knowing all powerful, loving, slow to anger, gives you peace in the middle of chaos, fight your battles, defend you, gives you grace and brand new mercies God, would love a person like myself. Someone who is so flawed, scary, doubtful, try to do things with my own power, HE LOVES ME THROUGH IT ALL. He loves me because He created Me in His Own Image. Because of that, I am powerful, I am strong, I am beautiful inside and out. I am creative, I am caring, I am slow to anger, I give grace, I show mercy. My strength is His JOY. He sees me as his daughter, his princess, his chosen one and  He saw me over 2000 years ago as someone worth fighting for and worth dying for.

HE LOVES ME THAT MUCH!

I was reading a devotion that caters to Singles and it was talking about 1 Corinthians 13.  It mentioned that 1 Corinthians 13 is the popular love chapter but it opened my eyes when the devotion mentioned about this chapter was talking about God. and I was like duhh Jeanine because we know that God IS love.Love is patient, love is kind, it does not boast, it does not get easily anger. All that is God.

I could go on and on and on about How God loves me but this one thing (another thing) I will say about Him is that He is PATIENT with me. He's patient with everyone but especially me. Just thinking all the times when I fell short or deliberately not spend time with Him because I wanted to do my own thing. He has always been there and has not loved me less. For that, God will always and forever be my 1st Love. 

P.S. Whoever this man of God that is coming to sweep me off my feet has no other choice but to come correct, because we are going to do this thang right! #GodlyDating #NoSexUntilMarriage #StayTuneForNextWeeksPost #NSUM